College Life

so, i've been here for 2.5 weeks, i've had 2 weeks of classes, i've gone to carriage hills a few times, hung out with Claire a few times, met my roommate and suitemates and have made some new friends, and have done a few other fun things. And, i've decided that i really enjoy life here, it's fun, there are lots of people, and i can really deal with the schedule here. And, to make it even better, I've been able to talk to Aaron almost every night and HE'S COMING TO VISIT TODAY!!!! That's another reason life has been so pleasant lately, I now have a boyfriend, Aaron, who is always there (even 80 miles away) to talk to and make me feel alright, and who'll love me! And now, after a month, I finally get to see him again! So, life is just dandy and while it could get better, i would be a fool to complain.

and you know it's gonna be alright

So, I've decided that life is all gonna work out fine. I pretty much have enough money for year one of college and have about 12 credits already, so combined with the other AP tests I have, I should be in pretty good shape. That and I'm beginning to think that I may actually enjoy it. Maybe I'll be adventerous for once. I mean, I'm already preparing- checklist:

• new laptop (love it!)
• printer (free with rebate which should be coming back any day now)
• record player (what kind of college kid doesn't have a record player?)
• CLAIRE!!!
• Carriage Hills (with camp people)
• big, fluffy quilt

all I need now is to graduate, which is nearly impossible for me to not do at this point...

Questions

so, I graduate in a little over a month, which is terrifying, yet I suppose, at the same time, empowering. Everything is set and planned out, it's all waiting on me. I'm not worried about summer too much, a little bit because I will not be able to staff as I wished to, but I think I can manage. Orientation scares me... Getting to college scares me... Meeting my roommate scares me... Going to Carriage Hills scares me (though I love the people there to DEATH)... Having to change jobs scares me... the chance that Claire might not want to hang out as much as she promised scares me. But at the same time, I will finally be without strings holding me anywhere - save myself, of course. But is that a good thing? Or do I still want those strings there? Will I be able to find people who I can relate to? Will Melanie and I remain good friends? What if I do hate it? What if I don't really want to do this whole Environmental thing? What's going to happen when I come home? How will my family go on without me? Am I going to end up all alone in a strange place?